The newest release from Queens of Thunder as mentioned in my remake of "Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!" featuring a brand new logo of the band. Rosie Catton (Miranda Cosgrove), whose pseudonym in Queens of Thunder is "Carrie Thunderwood" requested that the CD cover be a spoof of the popular natural Hawaiian cane sugar Sugar in the Raw, but instead of the closeup of sugar, you have two sugary-sweet lesbians locked in a an embrace and kissing ever so softly. I tried to tone this image in the color of the Sugar in the Raw package, but this was as close as I got. Sorry...
Studio Album by Queens of Thunder Released June 5th, 2012 Recorded February 2010-August 2011 Genre: Glam Metal, Hair Metal, Heavy Metal, Hard Rock Producer: Carrie Thunderwood
01. "Va-Jay-Jay Hunter" 02. "Hawaiian Tropic Girl" 03. "Sweet White Honey" 04. "N.I.P (Nude in Public)" 05. "Why I Can't Stand Boys" 06. "Hangovers Over Valley Girls" 07. "Diet Like Jolie" 08. "Stick to Being A Bitch" 09. "Lady From The Waterpark" 10. "Every Guy Is Useless" 11. "Bathed In Black Light (Kissed By The Moonlight)" 12. "You'd Shut Up If You Knew" 13. "Only Girls Can Have What I Have" 14. "Please Don't Look At Me" 15. "Community Property II: The Lesbian Version" (feat. Steel Panther) 16. "Fur Burger Went Bad" [Instrumental]
Below is a listing of the songs, with lyrics included on this CD:
01. Va-Jay-Jay Hunter
My parents really never got me into boys you see Your smelly Zipper Ripper doesn't really seem to please So shut the hell up and keep it in your fucking pants You like to wear too much AXE body spray because you haven't Washed your filthy ass for nearly several days Your Meat Missle failed to launch I shot your loser ass down Give your Long Island Ice Teas to a girl who needs them the most 'Cause it ain't gonna work
I'm a Va-Jay-Jay Hunter Looking for sweet titties to squeeze I'm a Va-Jay-Jay Hunter More than just a fling because girls are my thing I'm a Va-Jay-Jay Hunter Hungry for some poontang pie
"The good girl" from next door tried to hook me up with a boy today And I went ahead and said no fucking way Enough with your bullshit about how great guys are So go and sell your 15-year-old virgin ass to other boys in the school yard I ain't gonna take orders from a stupid little baby girl It'll be a cold day in hell before I date a guy Get out of my face before you get a black eye Did I stutter when I said I hate guys?
I'm a Va-Jay-Jay Hunter Looking for sweet titties to squeeze I'm a Va-Jay-Jay Hunter More than just a fling because girls are my thing I'm a Va-Jay-Jay Hunter Hungry for some poontang pie
I'm A VA-JAY-JAY HUNTER, YEAH!!!
I'm friends with the men of the metal world But that doesn't change my love for girls I pay for King Diamond's drinks at his favorite bar He and Livia know I'm a lezzy and they love me anyway I hang with James Hetfield and his wife Their kids are crazy about me and I spoil them rotten They love me too, so what's the big fucking problem? Lexxi Foxx is a great friend He thinks it's awesome I'm a lesbian YOU FUCKING ROCK, LEXXI!
[Spoken] See? Just because I have guy friends, doesn't mean I'm gonna date one... I'm not hungry for twinkie... I crave the pink heaven...
I'm a Va-Jay-Jay Hunter Looking for sweet titties to squeeze I'm a Va-Jay-Jay Hunter More than just a fling because girls are my thing I'm a Va-Jay-Jay Hunter Hungry for some poontang pie
I'm A VA-JAY-JAY HUNTER, YEAH!!!
02. Hawaiian Tropic Girl
Well I saw you getting out of the hotel swimming pool Golden body against the bright blue water Your bleached blonde hair wet and glistening Nipples hardened under your hot pink bikini That I want to squeeze, lick, and suck all day Just seeing you gets me wet between the legs baby I should know because we scissored each other at last week's show Come back to my room and let me give it to you more
Hawaiian Tropic Girl Your coconut suntan lotion intoxicates me Grind your peach against mine and put me on cloud nine Hawaiian Tropic Girl Make me cum until I see the white light of heaven Suck my toes show your love for me Hawaiian Tropic Girl I love you till the end of time I love you You're mine In a 69 Hawaiian Tropic Girl I love you...
Take me in a 69... Take me in a 69... Take me in a 69...
Grab that Kahlua off my nightstand Poor it on my tits and tight little clit Eat me out on the balcony Having people watching us screw Makes me want you more and more Are you plowed yet, baby? Good...
Hawaiian Tropic Girl Your coconut suntan lotion intoxicates me Grind your peach against mine and put me on cloud nine Hawaiian Tropic Girl Make me cum until I see the white light of heaven Suck my toes show your love for me Hawaiian Tropic Girl I love you till the end of time I love you You're mine In a 69 Hawaiian Tropic Girl I love you...
Take me in a 69... Take me in a 69... Take me in a 69...
03. Sweet White Honey
Sprawled out on the bed your legs open wide Nicely trimmed snatch with no fish smell to make me puke I love the way you moan so softly I know that you must be thinking of me No boy would ever really make you this horny But I really really wanna see your sweet muff glazing baby
Sweet White Honey (Mmmmm...) Sweet White Honey (Satisfy my sweet tooth, sugar) Sweet White Honey (Soo sweet...)
[Girl moans in pleasure softly]
I love the way you make me salivate baby My head spinning from when you licked me dry You said you liked guys but that's a dirty little lie Your love is on my way, I can see it in your eyes It's your first time with a lady so give it a try tonight
Sweet White Honey (Mmmmm...) Sweet White Honey (Satisfy my sweet tooth, sugar) Sweet White Honey (Soo sweet...)
[Whispering]
All in my face... Such a sweet taste... Let me lick you... Like an ice cream cone... Mmmm...
I love your sweet white honey...
04. N.I.P (Nude in Public)
"This is the story... about a girl who fell in love with nudity..."
When I was only 3 it felt so fun to go Without clothes in my backyard My parents thought it was cute and no one seemed to care When I became 16... A little beauty queen The sun washing over my body as I walked downtown L.A. Turning heads just made me wet between the legs I blow kisses to women and smile And make men suffer from a lethal case of blue balls
If you wanna have fun and feel free Cops can let you off the hook because you look so cute Liberate yourself Flaunt yourself
N.I.P (Nude in Public) N.I.P (Nude in Public) N.I.P (Nude in Public) It's the way to be
I'm not ashamed because I have a hot little body That everyone is checking out So don't be surprised if you see my boobies When I have a drink with you Don't hit on me if you're a guy Keep it in your pants or I'll rip out your eyes
If you wanna have fun and feel free Cops can let you off the hook because you look so cute Liberate yourself Flaunt yourself
Cop: "Ma'am, is there any reason why you're walking around naked?" Carrie [sweetly]: "Clothes make me break out. I'm so sorry." Cop: "You don't have to be sorry, I understand."
N.I.P (Nude in Public) N.I.P (Nude in Public) N.I.P (Nude in Public) It's the way to be
Carrie: "Mmmm... Like what you see?"
05. Why I Can't Stand Boys
The girls in the band don't care if I'm a lezzy In fact, they think it's cool Having male fans are one thing It's when they try to get me into the sack is where I draw the fucking line My snatch is community property for women So forget about trying to wine and dine me guys How would you like a knuckle sandwich with a side of fries? That's what I thought...
Just because you're a guy and I make you horny Doesn't give you an invitation into my panties You still live with your mama and never gotten laid in your entire life If you're a guy, you can be friends with me But if you try to hit on me you're gonna get a mouthful of teeth That's the reason why I can't stand boys So you guys better quit leaving love letters on my Facebook page
Sittin' at the wet bar drinking cold Dos Equis Chatting with Tom Araya and his wife Sandra Quentin Tarantino's upstairs screwing Britney Spears Alisa Reyes steels a kiss from me Johnny Kelly's wanting a picture with me (BFF photo op!) Charlie Sheen's hitting on Demi Moore While Lordi are rockin' downstairs Daniella Monet's playing tonsil hockey With Danielle Morrow You've got to admit, they make a sexy pair...
Friends with guys is one thing Don't try anything funny or you'll be swallowing teeth Let me kick you in the balls so you can't have kids All you do is eat and fuck So don't push your luck, get out of my face I'm gonna beat your smelly hairy ass all over the place You know I can't stand boys That's why I can't stand boys
Spoken: "Not one bit..."
06. Hangovers Over Valleygirls
If I wanted to hear you yacking I'll go drink myself silly You act all perky and overly-cheery But it seems your fake boobs are bigger Than your underused i.q. When I go out to get a bite to eat At my favorite Sonic I hear that voice ripping straight through my head 'Cause you never learn to shut your fucking mouth What am I supposed to do? Well I ain't gonna come here sober again There's only one thing left for me to do And that's to get drunk off my lezzy ass
They dress like sluts to outshine their girlfriends Be a cock-tease to random guys Heads buried in their CrackBerries Adding "like" to everything they say Really ruins my day I'm far from puking my guts out Still drunk as hell Things are going swell Hangovers Over Valleygirls Is how I tolerate the "Clueless" reject bitches
So you call me a little emo because I wear headbanger garbs And you get me clothes from Tommy Hilfiger that you know I'll never wear You try to hook me up with the football team's main captain Well I got news for you, bitch, it's never gonna happen Honey, get the hell away from me before I dunk your head Into a piss-filled toilet
They dress like sluts to outshine their girlfriends Be a cock-tease to random guys Heads buried in their CrackBerries Adding "like" to everything they say Really ruins my day I'm far from puking my guts out Still drunk as hell Things are going swell Hangovers Over Valleygirls Is how I tolerate the "Clueless" reject bitches
Underneath the football field's bleachers Knocking back a case of Bacardi Black Getting dizzy... Can't hardly walk... Are those fucking "Clueless" bitches back? Leave me alone Let me black out in peace I'll kick the bitchy cheerleader captain's ass... I know I'll choose hangovers over valleygirls anyday...
Valley Girl: "Hey, did you, like, hear that annoying little emo girl just left in the middle of our history class? Like, what was her problem?"
07. Diet Like Joley
You had a body that any girl or guy wanted I loved you in Tomb Raider and GIA You were so beautiful to look at while I fingered my twat When I go to sleep at night and dream of you baby I wanna pull your full body close to mine And run my lips across your big soft tits I love you I want to do you
But now you're down to 95lbs and that really breaks my heart You keep your illness hidden from your adopted global kids It's a miracle, honey, that you're not even dead The way you diet is enough to kill you Can't you see the tears in my eyes when I'm wanting back the old you? It will never be through... I want the old you... Not the new you...
Don't worry, baby, I'll wine you and dine you Help you put some meat on your sweet little body The world doesn't need another Calista Flockhart I need my Lara Croft back, I want you to be with me You can look beautiful around 2, 000 calories a day Just don't diet like Jolie
Sittin' pretty in a booth at Ruby Tuesday looking at you With the love I have in my eyes for you baby Have I told you lately that I love you? I'm doing all this just for you I lean over to give you a kiss and I taste the Double chocolate cake that you have on your breath
Please understand I'm not making you fat Like Kirstie Alley once was I just want to feel your full body when we get naked And starting to hug Anything you want on the menu, my love... I'll get it for you
Don't worry, baby, I'll wine you and dine you Help you put some meat on your sweet little body The world doesn't need another Calista Flockhart I need my Lara Croft back, I want you to be with me You can look beautiful around 2, 000 calories a day Just don't diet like Jolie
Just don't diet like Jolie... Just don't diet like Jolie... Just don't diet... like Jolie...
Whispering: "To Angelina Jolie... I love you..." [smooch]
08. Stick to Being A Bitch
You were so cute when you were a little girl And knock-out when you grew up But you took your tits, your twat, and tight ass And threw that all away
Your mama tried to support you and stand beside you no matter what If your dad was here today, he would rip you a new asshole You were sexy a lady But you're ugly as a man Let me throw your fat ass in the back of a van And beat some fucking sense into you now that you're a man
Mommy loved you better as her daughter and not her son Make up your mind, you're a girl, not a guy If I were you, and you know it's true I would have stuck with being a bitch instead of being the new you
People loved you better back when you were a sexy fucking blonde And now when I look at you I wonder what the hell has happened to you An articifial dick were your twat used to be Just ain't gonna work for you If I was your surgeon who made you into a guy This is what I'd say to you:
Mommy loved you better as her daughter and not her son Make up your mind, you're a girl, not a guy If I were you, and you know it's fucking true I would have stuck with being a bitch instead of being the new you
It was better when girls were eating you out And you had toys stuck in you It was better even when your pussy stank peeled paint off the walls If you had remained a girl, they would've casted you in "Room in Rome"
Mommy loved you better as her daughter and not her son Make up your mind, you're a girl, not a guy If I were you, and you know it's true I would have stuck with being a bitch instead of being the new you
Chastity, you were so much better as a girl instead of a guy... Seriously!! STICK TO BEING A FUCKING BITCH!
09. Lady From The Waterpark
Yesterday me and Lucia needed to beat the heat So we cruised on down to Splashtown and ended up seeing a babe Because it was too damn hot we decided to ditch our bikinis So what if anyone saw us flaunting our sexy soft naked bodies? There was no way in hell that we were gonna be kicked out
NO WAY! NO FUCKING WAY! YEAH!
Pavement hot as hell (scorching sun beating down) Step into the blue (my nipples getting hard) So damn cold it's nice I see the first hot girl Wanna rock her world She's my lady from the waterpark I'm in love with the lady from the water park
OH YEAH!
We bought everyone a round of smoothies Too bad this place don't have no booze I took the hot girl from the pool ate her out in the ladies' shower room It felt so good to strip her down And to my surprise, no one said a fucking word No one seemed to care Kissing, huggin', lovin', run my fingers through her hair
Pavement hot as hell (scorching sun beating down) Step into the blue (my nipples getting hard) So damn cold it's nice I see the first hot girl Wanna rock her world She's my lady from the waterpark I'm in love with the lady from the water park
OH YEAH!
Now this is what I call the ultimate summer love... Yeah...
10. Every Guy Is Useless
Still stuck at home, no place to go Living with your parents and you're 36 years old Something tells me you ain't never gonna get a ho So stop watching MANSwers Get off your fat ass I'd rather be drinking than watch you smoke that grass You're a worthless piece of shit why can't you see The only thing you do is kiss your daddy's ass Maybe bum money for shit you don't need?
You want a mother, not a lover You're a mama's boy She's never ever gonna let you go and get laid You should've been out on your own It's too late for that If you were in my toilet I wouldn't bother flushing it You're just useless (You can't do shit) Every guy is useless (What do you say to that?)
A bunch of whiny-ass teenaged boys Have nothing better to do than go play with their toys Just let me take that Little John CD you're listening to And ram it up your sorry ass
Sad sack of poser shit jerking off to Lady Gaga Miley Cyrus on your desktop Jay-Z and Taylor Swift over your bed Grow a fucking pair of balls Get the hell outta bed And get a fucking life before I stomp in your fucking head
You want a mother, not a lover You're a mama's boy She's never ever gonna let you go and get laid You should've been out on your own It's too late for that If you were in my toilet I wouldn't bother flushing it You're just useless (You can't do shit) Every guy is useless (What do you say to that?)
Spoken: "Always an ass-kisser... a fucking people-pleaser. You wouldn't know real heavy metal if it bit you in the ass. Looking at internet porn is the closest thing you'll get to having pussy."
Every guy is useless And that ain't no lie...
11. Bathed In Black Light (Kissed By The Moonlight)
Spoken: "When darkness falls... and the moon comes out... Such a divine creature... A sexy... child of the night..."
Tight hot little body clad all in black I love the way your purple highlights cascade down your back Sweet little mama with ice blue eyes shining like stars at night I knew you weren't scared of me (you secretly loved me) Because you saw me at Hot Topic and Star Bucks plenty of times I smell your breath of blood-red wine and mint leaf cigarettes when we kiss My head spins... your soft sweet lips make me salivate... Wanting you more... When I undress you... In your bedroom... Your parents... not caring at all... The skull from your red and black lingerie... staring back at me... I know that I'm making you weak at the knees... Your thong panties... dripping wet... Tonight's the night... I lick your vampire princess clit dry... Let me scissor you... grind against you... plugging you... with a strap-on dildo... Amidst your Lovecraftian decor... You came so hard... screaming in orgasmic bliss... Mascara-clotted tears running down your eyes... Kissing... and sucking on your lips... I feel your hand caressing my hair... Our bodies bathed in black light... Your pale naked body... Kissed by the moonlight... Take me into your arms... Your ebony finger nails... gleaming... Draw my sweet sanguine from my tits... when you bite deep... and gently... I'll cry in love... Just for you... Make me yours... Drink from me... Feed your hunger... My immortal beloved...
12. You'd Shut Up If You Knew
There you go again Stupid horny guy trying to get into my pants when you know I'll drop your ass in the blink of an eye Slap my ass and I'll break your hand I promise you You'll never have kids again Why do you keep hitting on me when I'm trying to get shit-faced?
You're in the wrong bar You're in the wrong place You're wasting your time So piss off man You'd stop after the millionth time I said no You'd shut up if you knew I like girls Instead of you
Return your phony diamond ring to the pawn shop and get your 20 bucks back Don't make me rip off your balls and staple them to your ass crack And when I say fuck off you prick because the sight of you just makes me sick So please stop yacking about how much you love World of Warcraft I'm getting sick and tired of all your crap Was my beer in the face enough for you? You fucker that's a good waste of juice...
You're in the wrong bar You're in the wrong place You're wasting your time So piss off man You'd stop after the millionth time I said no You'd shut up if you knew I like girls Instead of you
So take your flowers And your candy And your nerdy ass home Go cry to mama how I dropped your ass If you stayed any longer in this place I would've gone and rearranged your geeky face...
"Piss off, you Trekkie piece of shit..."
13. Only Girls Can Have What I Have
There ain't nothing wrong with having male fans I consider them a bunch to be my motherfucking friends It's only when a guy tries to get into my pants That I lose my foot deep up his aas
Metallic hot lipstick Glittery body spray A sweet sexy little honey to brighten my day
Guy fan: "That was a helluva show, can I hang out with ya?"
Carrie: "Thanks, dude. Got any beer?"
Guy fan: "I sure as shit do."
Carrie: "Welcome aboard."
[Beer can top pops]
My buddy Bret Michaels comes along with 19 girls on his arm So many ladies to choose I can't decide which one Come back to my room for a 20-way One girl stuck her tongue down my throat when she had doritoes and tequila Makes my head spin...
Girls can love me, girls can do me, girls can have me They can lick me They can suck me I'm off limits to guys and I'll tell you why Only girls can have what I have
They can have me...
Trapped in a sea of sweet-smelling skin So many hot lips against my tits and mouth Tongue gets sucked and I get fingered Taste of sweet white honey in my mouth still lingers
You all taste so good...
The best part about this whole orgy There was never any fishy clit that got to me But if one refused to wash when I ate her out I move my head to the side and puke my fucking guts out
"Well, there went my dinner from T.G.I Friday's... WHY DON'T YOU FUCKING WASH NEXT TIME?!"
Girls can love me, girls can do me, girls can have me They can lick me They can suck me I'm off limits to guys and I'll tell you why Only girls can have what I have
They can have me...
14. Please Don't Look At Me
Now that you're here let me tell you one thing I don't want a girl/guy fling I'm a lesbian you understand? I never wanna date a man So if you wanna be my friend I can respect that Going steady with a dude makes me fucking sick I love pussy but I sure hate dick
Please don't look at me Please don't look at me I'll drop your sorry sad sack ass if you hit on me I'm too happy being a horny little lezzy Please don't look at me
You text your stupid guy friends And told him that you almost got laid I'm not a fucking bisexual girl The sight of you makes me hurl One thing's for certain, boy... I'm aint gonna be your naughty maid
You're 37 years old and you live with your mom No random girl in the world would ever make you cum So leave my ass the hell alone Before I hang you with the nerdy black tie you wear Stop bothering me and get the fuck off my back How many times do I have to tell you this?
Please don't look at me Please don't look at me I'll drop your sorry sad sack ass if you hit on me I'm too happy being a horny little lezzy Please don't look at me
Go bother a desperate and lonely whore You know I can't take no more You just don't get it when I flip you the bird Why don't you fuck off and go eat a turd?
You better stop bragging to your chess club friends you're gonna get laid And that you're gonna go and take them to a panty raid You had your chances at being friends with me and you blew them sky high The only thing you're gonna get from me is a big black eye So stop buying drinks for my band mates then go lay down and die I fucking told you I don't date guys
Please don't look at me Please don't look at me Shut your fucking mouth and show me respect Before I break your scrawny pencil-thin neck? Please don't look at me Please don't look at me
15. Community Property II: The Lesbian Version (feat. Steel Panther)
Carrie: "Hey, Mike."
Michael: "What?"
Carrie: "Remember when you did 'Community Property?'"
Michael: "Oh yeah."
Satchel: "Best fucking video ever. Hot and cold running pussy on tap, man!"
Michael: "Damn straight. Censored version was a little iffy, but nothing kicks fucking ass more than having our shit uncut and uncensored, you know what I'm talkin' about?"
Lexxi: "Best part about it for me was having a couple of chicks laying on me with their asses in the air."
Stixx: "Be pretty sweet to feature a lesbian version. Me and Carrie were talking about it just last week at Applebee's."
Morgan: "Guys like anything that have lesbians in there. If it's a movie or TV show they're watching, you know they're gonna beat off to it." (laughs)
Carrie: "No doubt. So what do you say, Mike, that you and the boys sing some of the vocals with me? And who knows, when we do make a video with alot of sweet-ass lesbians in there, you can join the fun. How does that sound?"
Michael: "Sounds like a good fucking plan to me, Carrie."
Carrie: "I'm doing this because you guys are my friends and I love you to death."
Stixx: "We love you, too, Carrie. So, you guys ready?"
Carrie: "Let's do this."
[Thunderwood]
You know honey I wouldn't trade you for anyone else in the world Because you're always gonna be my baby girl My heart and soul will always be forever yours When I'm out on the road girls wanna do me but that doesn't change The fact that you and I were meant to be Please don't cry when I'm in bed with another girl (I also rock her world) My heart belongs to you I would lay down my life and die for you You will always have me honey But my twat is community property
[Starr]
I'm making sure that my friend's clit doesn't get pounded Because she's keeping it wet for you You know your woman really really loves you And the wedding will resume when the tour is through So delete the break-up emails Yahoo! outbox Please understand that Carrie doesn't enjoy cock She has no reason to break up with you because you're her's Because you mean the world to her
[Thunderwood]
My heart belongs to you I would lay down my life and die for you You will always have me honey But my twat is community property
I reject and drop alot of guys who want to get me in bed If it were up to me I'd chop of their cocks And let them bleed in the tub till they're dead When I stop on by our place to be with you Take me into your arms And I'll break down and cry Don't need no reason why
My heart belongs to you I would lay down my life and die for you You will always have me honey But my twat is community property
[Satchel]
Let us make it clear, guys, so you retain it Carrie's twat is a free spirit And there's no way in hell that you're ever gonna Pound it No you can't just fucking plow her
[Steel Panther]
NO!
[Carrie]
I love you so much My heart hurts when I miss you I lay in bed and I can't help but finger my clit I just wish you were here so you can nibble at it... Mmmm...
My heart belongs to you I would lay down my life and die for you You will always have me honey But my twat is community property
Community property... Community property... Comunnity property...
"And baby, I promise... when this tour is over, I'll be *YOUR* property... I love you..."
Lesbian couple source image found on Google... then again I'm not sure. Don't sue me, this is just a cover I whipped together... Comment on your favorite song.
Alright, I've searched the internet and I can't find this band anywhere. Like, ever. There's rumors that it would have played in ozzfest in 2006, and that's it. What gives?